How To Murder Your Wife, and Mister Roberts

Tonight was another double-feature at the Stanford Theatre:

How To Murder Your Wife (1965) is a rather vile and twisted little film, apparently loathing men and women both (albeit women more than men), and treating it all as the most madcap comedy. While it does have some very funny moments, much of the slapstick is just tiresome.

Stanley Ford (Jack Lemmon) is a cartoonist, writing the daily adventures of Bash Brannigan, Secret Agent, in your daily paper. He's a confirmed bachelor - confirmed, that is, by his man Charles (Terry-Thomas), who frequently notes that marriage has been the ruination of many a man, and he's proud to be working for Mr. Ford. However, one night at a bachelor party, Ford on the spur of the moment (and while heavily drunk) marries a blonde bombshell who pops out of a cake (Virna Lisi; perversely, she is never named, and is only ever called "Mrs. Ford"). Ford attempts to get a divorce - especially once he learns that Mrs. Ford only speaks Italian - but his lawyer Harold (Eddie Mayehoff) says he has no grounds.

Frustrated at his situation (Mrs. Ford starts replacing his "masculine" apartment decorations with an assortment of floral patterns and bric-a-brac; her cooking causes him to gain ten pounds; though he's barely reluctant to keep having sex with her), he reworks his comic strip into "The Brannigans", about the henpecked secret agent having been captured by a wife of his own. When this proves unsatisfying, he decides to have Brannigan do away with his wife... which causes him problems of his own when Mrs. Ford abruptly disappears.

It's easy to say that this film is a product of its time, with its portrayal of women as part sex object and part manipulating witch. The first is just, well, sort of expected (look at the contemporary James Bond films of the era), but the second is just nasty, especially when the conniving dialogues between lawyer Harold's wife and Mrs. Ford are added in. The film is relentless in its condemnation of marriage (from the man's point of view), while trying vainly to redeem itself with a "well, maybe it was true love after all" ending (true lust, maybe...). The story, naturally, makes little sense, and his inability to find a way out of his situation (if he really doesn't want to be married) makes Ford seem utterly spineless. Characterizations change at the drop of a hat for purposes of the story, and Charles, while sometimes amusing for the sheer ridiculous earnestness that Terry-Thomas throws into his role, seems more repulsive than anything else.

Is there anything to recommend here? Other than a few witticisms here and there, not really. Lemmon's performance is among his weakest, and none of the other actors are notable. If you have low expectations or a bizarre sense of humor, maybe give this a try, but otherwise don't bother.

Mister Roberts (1955) is a much better work. Based on a novel and a stage play, it's a series of linked vignettes about Lt. Doug Roberts (Henry Fonda), chief cargo officer aboard a US naval supply vessel in the Pacific in the waning days of World War II. Roberts yearns to be assigned to a combat ship and knows his opportunity is vanishing, but he's stymied by his exemplary performance on the supply ship, as the tyrannical Captain Morton (James Cagney) wants him there to help him attain command of a more important ship. Since Roberts is a man of good conscience, he rarely bucks Morton's orders, except where it does the men under him some good. He keeps trying to work through the chain of command, commiserating with his friend Doc (William Powell), and putting up with his layabout bunkmate Ensign Pulver (Lemmon).

The vignettes include a visit from some nurses at a nearby island, a shore leave at a different port which goes disastrously wrong (or right, depending on your point of view), the struggle between Roberts and Morton to operate the ship effectively, and the futile daydreaming of Pulver.

One thing that can't be denied here is the acting: Fonda is a pure heroic figure thrust into less-than-heroic circumstances, and he's a perfect contrast to Cagney's Captain Morton. Cagney steals every scene he's in, his small stature immediately attracting the eye, not to mention his intense expressions and barking commands. Sure, he's not a very complex character, but through sheer force of personality Cagney turns in a superlative performance.

On the other hand, it's Jack Lemmon as Ensign Pulver who won the Oscar (for Best Supporting Actor), and he also does a good job. Comparing it to Lemmon's other roles, it's actually perhaps his purest turn: He's earnest and wide-eyed, optimistic but not much more than a lap-dog when it comes to results. In fact, I realized that he reminds me of no one so much as Jim Carrey (in, for instance, The Truman Show); they even look alike!

To be fair, the film is a series of vignettes, so it's not really building to a big ending upon which everything else is justified, but it was a little disappointing how obvious the developments in the denouement were; I suspected them an hour ahead of time. Still, that's only a small disappointment; otherwise, Mister Roberts is a collection of fine acting with many entertainment moments and some heartwarming morals. Well worth a look.

Tonight was actually the third time in three nights I'd been in Palo Alto: Friday was for more movies, of course, but Saturday I met Lucy for dinner. We went to an Indian restaurant CJ had introduced me to a couple of years back, and we ate way too much food. Well, I did, anyway, as I ended up helping Lucy (almost) finish hers. And then we went to a gellato place for dessert! But it was a nice, relaxing evening, even though I felt like I didn't talk very much for most of it. But maybe Lucy just had more she wanted to talk about.

The rest of the weekend was only moderately busy. I talked to my friend Karen and we set up plans for me to visit her in Portland for a long weekend in the near future, and I went out to Travelocity and bought tickets for it. I've never been to Portland, so I'm looking forward to it. I suspect the whole weekend will be booked before I know it!

I also went out and made an impulse purchase: I might have mentioned that at work I've been making extensive use of iTunes lately. I've loaded something like 2 days of music onto my Mac there to listen to it, and it's cool! However, the tinny speaker that comes standard on the Mac wasn't really cutting it, so I decided to buy some better speakers to plug into the machine. After doing some research, I went out and picked up some Altec Lansing ATP3 speakers, which I took into work and plugged in tonight, and they sound really good! Well, really good to me; I'm not really an audiophile. But they certainly brought out the bass quite nicely, and they make listening to acoustic music (such as James Taylor) much more pleasant. I think this will have been a good investment.

I'll have to try using them for Quake or MYST III Exile sometime soon...

Debbi's back from her vacation this week, which will put an end to all the noodling around I've been doing lately. But I bet I can persuade her to go see some old movies with me...